My hairdresser is usually an upbeat and positive woman. Her energy pulls me into the moment and her “bright side” approach helps me forget the fact that I seem to have a little more grey to cover every time.
Yesterday was different. Tears teased the corners of her eyes as she detailed all that had happened to her recently. She was valiantly trying to hold it together, but it was like her emotions were winning at tug-of-war, pulling her over the edge.
Finally, as she applied the last of my color, she wiped the corner of her left eye, picked up a curling iron and exclaimed,
“Damn it. I am going to be beautiful today.”
And she was. I watched as her hair – and her face – transformed while we waited for my color to set. As each new ringlet was formed, her eyes became a little more determined and her expression became a little more hopeful.
It is a fact of life for all of us – bad days will happen.
Some bad days are of the, “I overslept and my car was rear ended on the way to work.” Other bad days fall into the, “I just buried my best friend” category. And in between those, there will be plenty of the, “I’m just not feeling it today” variety.
On those bad days, there is the temptation to crawl back under the covers and wait for the next sunrise to signal a do-over. Our minds feel pulled towards what’s not going right, thinking about it even past the point where thinking is needed. The plummet of our emotions seems as inevitable as a raft in whitewater poised at the top of a waterfall. We yearn to avoid the discomfort and so we try to distract with food, a drink or busyness. And the idea that things can be better is nothing but a distant possibility, so hazy that it seems like the false hope of a mirage.
Not every day is a good day.
Yet even if the chips are down and the tears are frequent, it is still YOUR day.
You can make the decision to show up anyway.
To proclaim, “Damn it. I am going to be present. I am going to persist. I am going to be positive.”
My husband likes to say that loyalty isn’t about being there when things are good; it is about being there when things are bad.
Be faithful to yourself.
Even on the bad days, show up.
And never confuse a bad day for a bad life.
Lessons From the End of a Marriage 
I almost skipped past this post. Don’t take offense, I just had my mind set on doing something. I hit the back button and read this. It is exactly what I needed to hear. I just sent a snapchat to my friend saying, “Oh my gosh, the depression today, it’s almost to much” and I’m literally on the verge of tears today. Never confuse a bad day for a bad life. Thank you for giving me hope.
Thank you so much for this… needed to hear it… a bad day or bad times does not equal a bad life… thank you…